The Weirdness of Boys, Pt. II

For my final voices entry I present another dialogue from one of my boys.
Jeren is not known for his mad cleaning skills. In fact, he is known for the opposite: Mad laziness skills! He reminds me of Pigpen from Charlie Brown, with a cloud of dust following him everywhere. I don't say that in any mean way at all. It's just a fact of life.

Today I got my new washer and dryer. The first dryer was broken (it somehow got smashed in the front) and so they put the washer in the house and fixed it so I could use it and went back for another dryer.

I'm already a little selfish with my chores and when I have a new toy, I become extremely selfish about my chores. I like to be the one to break things in when they are mine. I put a load of laundry in as soon as the guy left to go get the dryer.

Jeren came into the kitchen when he heard the truck leave.

Jeren: "So, how do I use these things?"
(Jeren has never done laundry in his life. Not only am I not good at sharing, but he has never shown any real interest.)
Me: "You aren't going to use these things today. I haven't even figured them out, yet."
Jeren: "But I have a HUGE pile of laundry in my room and it needs to be washed."
(Never mind that EVERY DAY he has a HUGE pile of laundry in his room that he walks over to get to his desk.)
Me: "These are brand new and I'm going to be the one to break them in, figure them out and try the different features, first. They are my toys. After I am used to them, maybe I will show you how to use them, but not today. I have lots of wash to do because I haven't been able to do it for four or five days."
Jeren: "I have a HUGE pile of laundry that needs to be done. I wanted to do it today!"
Me: "Jeren, you are not using these today!"

At this point he got mad and stomped out of the room.

A little later he came back in and I tried to explain to him that I might show him tomorrow or the next day some of the important features. He just said, "I don't want to talk about it anymore!" (using his mad voice)

Haha.
What a guy!

I am the H.A.L 9000. You may call me Hal.

I think voices is a really hard theme. Of course, due to time constraints, I have been unable to find time to read how anyone else handled this theme, but I am really looking forward to June and a new topic.
On the plus side: I have managed to keep up with the blogging, even while whining and complaining about the theme. Yes, I know the theme is just a suggestion, but I enjoy trying my best to keep my posts on topic. I have been mostly successful with this topic, sometimes quite by accident.





So here are some quotes and they are quoted by some voices from movies:

Hayley Mills: "I've got a scathingly brilliant idea!"

Kevin Pollack: "He does think better with that bat!"

Jack Nicholson: "Don't bark at me! I didn't name you!"

Groucho Marx: "One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know."

Al Pacino: "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." (although I got this quote from "Two Weeks Notice".)

Charlton Heston: "Soylent Green is people!"

HAL: "I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do. "

HAL: "Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over."

HAL: "I am completely operational, and all my circuits are functioning perfectly."

Tommy Lee: "A person is smart; people are dumb panicky dangerous animals and you know it."

And that's all I have time to find today. I didn't put the movies, but you can ask if you need to know! haha.

The Voice of Boys

David and Jeren in younger days.



So, yeah! Boys are weird, as all we girls already know. Just how weird are they?

Today my sister called to ask if my boys (19 and 24 years old) could help her move a hutch she had just bought up the street. It was a simple request as the hutch was sitting in the truck in the driveway and only had to be moved from the truck to the garage. I decided to make an executive decision and just say yes.
After I hung up the phone, I called out to the boys and let them know my sister was on her way over to pick them up to help. Oh, the whining and complaining that I heard. "I just got off work!" "Pete's on his way back over in a few." "Moving a hutch?" whine, whine, whine. haha.
Now mind you, they were not doing anything important at all. Jeren had bought himself a new air rifle and pistol and they were standing on the front porch with their friend, Jeff, shooting little plastic pellets at random things in the yard. (non-living things).
After their whining session I said, "Oh come on! It won't take any time at all with the three of you! Just deal!"
What an instant change I witnessed. Suddenly they were saying, "Haha, Jeff! You got recruited!" In just a split second they went from whining and complaining to joyfully poking fun at Jeff because I included him in the bargain.
Ha!
Boys are just weird like that.
My sister showed up a few minutes later. I don't think they were even gone five minutes and she paid them with a box of Dr. Pepper.

Descriptions

Just a little edit because I forgot to put in the part that these are as translated from a phone call.

At my job we often have to write descriptions on customers. We phone the descriptions from one location to the other. If you've ever played that phone game where you have to pass a word or phrase from one person to the other, then you will understand these.

Here are some entertaining versions of what they were wearing.


Ten pans (tan pants)
Gold neckleless (gold necklace)
Silver neckless (silver necklace)
China pants (shiny pants)
Blue fleas (blue fleece)
Brown mousetach (brown mustache)
Go-T (goatee)
Small goat tee (small goatee)
Big goatie (Big goatee)
Black coat, no arms (black vest)
Black coat with striped arms (black coat with striped sleeves)
Floral skirt. (only funny because the skirt had no flowers on it at all. It was plaid.)


There have been more, but these are the ones I can remember without straining my brain.

Little voices.

10-6-1983
Sean and I when he was 2 years 3 months:

Me: "You ought to go to Hollywood!"
Sean: "No, Hollywood!" (shaking his head no)
Me: "You don't want to be an actor?"
Sean: "NO!"
Me: "Well, then what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Sean: "Me!"


11/9/83
Today Sean said "dammit" i.e., "dammit, Keri, I want water!"
I called him in to talk about it and said that he shouldn't use that kind of language. He said something to indicate that he felt it was appropriate and I told him it was never appropriate for a two-year-old. He was disappointed, but agreed that I might be right.

Laurie informed me today that she got an "F" because the paper she was supposed to turn in was in her desk! (???)
Later, I found out she didn't get one, after all.

Keri informed me today that she only got two tallies. (It takes three to get paddled.)
(yes, in those days, kids got paddled at school.)

12/21/1983
Sean was bugging me about lunch. I said, "Oh, go make your own!" He left the room and I went back to what I was doing. He came back in and said, "I can't reach it!"
"Can't reach what?", I asked. He replied, "The peanut butter." I followed him to the kitchen where he had gotten out two slices of bread, wrapped the rest and put it back and gotten the jam out of the fridge. He was 29 months.

1/23/84
Laurie let Heather sit on her lunch pail today to close it and destroyed it. It was actually Sean's because her other one fell apart last Friday. I bought her and Keri new lunch pails today, although Keri's had the same one for three years.

3/22/1986
The boys were fighting over who was going to get to look at the cereal box and which side they should get to see. It was "Generic Wheat Flakes". It had exactly the same black and white lettering and words on all four sides.


That's all for today. Just a few tidbits I found while looking through some old journals.