Jeren, the worry wort.

You can clearly see by this picture that Jeren was a worry-wort from the very beginning. The picture is of him worrying over the headlines when he is around seven months old.
Anyone who knows Jeren, knows that he can find a point of worry in almost any situation. Case in point:
Mom and I pick him up from work every day. If neither of us is available I let him know when I drop him off in the morning. It's a daily thing. Mom picks him up on the days I work. I pick him up on the days I don't. There have been a few times that he ends up taking the bus home because something comes up. Yet, every day, he phones us to find out if we are picking him up and then phones again to let us know we can go ahead and leave. I never leave when he phones, because if I were to leave then, I would be sitting around for 15 - 20 minutes waiting for him to get off. I know the way, I know how long it takes and I leave accordingly, which I tell him often. It doesn't matter. Every day, two phone calls to "make sure". He's a worry wort. He has a long history of memorable worry moments. Here are a few of them.


I used to take the kids to the library every week. One time on the way home Jeren started crying his eyes out. He was just sobbing. When I asked him what was wrong his answer was:
"What will I do on the first day?"
I answered, "First day of what?"
He replied, "What will I do for food on my first day in my new apartment when I grow up?"
SIX.
He was six!
I told him he didn't need to worry. If he had the money to get an apartment, he would have the money to buy the necessary food. That seemed to allay his fears for the moment.


I think the following moment of terror in my little worry wort's mind was the precursor to the story above.

He was playing in his room. All of a sudden he came screaming out of his room, bawling his head off and all upset. I figured the older boys had done something and I asked Jeren what was wrong. His reply:

"The boys said I have to go to HEAVEN when I die. They said everyone has to go to heaven. Do I have to go to heaven? I like it here. I don't want to go somewhere else."

That one took a little more effort to figure out how to calm him down.

Turns out that the actual conversation started out like this:
Jeren: "What's going to happen if mom dies while I'm in college?"
Boys: "It will be ok, Jeren, because you will be a grown-up and be able to take care of yourself."
Jeren: "But what will happen? Where will mom go? Who will live here with me?"
Boys: "You will be able to live by yourself. Mom will go to heaven."
Jeren: "But how will I see mom if she is in heaven?"
Boys: "It's ok, Jeren, because someday you will go to heaven, too. We will all go to heaven when we die."
That's when he came screaming out to the kitchen. If I remember right, that conversation took place a few weeks before the panic attack he had in the car about moving into an apartment.

One day my friend Rhonda and I were discussing if she was going to take back her old house. I didn't even realize that Jeren was listening. My daughter, Keri, was renting it from her at that time. A few days later we were in the car when Jeren started crying. I asked him what was wrong. His reply:
"Where will Keri live if Rhonda takes her house back?" He was seven.

When he was in the second grade he had Mrs. Werkhoven for his teacher. Jeren was a model student in grade school, getting student of the month every year for the first four years. Their discipline program was based on pulling cards. (Blue, green, yellow and red, with red being the worst.) Jeren had never pulled a card. Never!

One day he came home from school. He was sitting on the couch watching television when he started crying. Pretty soon he had himself all upset, bawling his eyes out. I, of course, asked him what was wrong.
Me: "What's wrong now?"
Jeren: "Mrs. Werkhoven made a new rule." (at this point he fell apart and started crying hysterically.)
I calmed him down and said, "Oh, so did you get in trouble?"
Jeren: (still crying) "NOOOOO!" (very loud and emphatic)
Me: "Ok, so what is the new rule?"
Jeren: "Mrs. Werkhoven said that if we talk in line we have to pull a card!"
At this point he is sobbing.
I said, "So, you had to pull a card?"
Jeren: "NOOOO!"
I was a little confused by this time because he was obviously quite upset over the new rule. So I said, "So, why are you so upset?"
He replied, "What if someone talks to me in line and I forget and answer?"
I laughed. I couldn't help it.
Me: "Jeren, I really don't think Mrs. Werkhoven is aiming that at you. I think she must have some trouble makers that don't listen and continue to talk in line."
Jeren: "She does!"
Me: "OK, well, I think you will be fine. Even if you "forget" and accidentally answer someone, I am sure you will be fine."

Jeren's student of the month certificate from Mrs. Werkhoven